I definitely hate typing this particular blog post, but my blog journey would not be genuine without discussing the hardships and rejections that one may encounter during their career journey. With that said, I am forced to spell it out to my readers...that I did NOT get accepted into grad school.
This was one hard pill to swallow.
I received the news sometime late last week. Through email, I was alerted that my application was received WAY after the commitee decided on who they wanted in their program WAY before the deadline. Sadly, I was amongst the ones not picked to start graduate school in the Fall. This sucks. I felt like I did everything I was supposed to. I have invested so much money into applying for this school and taking tests, only to be let down. *sighs*
Another devastating blow is the fact that this was the only graduate school I applied to. So, I have no Plan Bs. Also, not being in school will cause me to lose my insurance. Most of the grad school fall due dates have passed; however, there is one small glimmer of hope that I could take up an online degree. At this point, I really don't care where or how. Just let me get in soon, please.
I am trying to remain hopeful because my cousin will be leaving for pharmacy school in two days. I want to remain hopeful that I, too, can pull it through and get into someone's school; a school of what I really want to do. She keeps me hopeful because she was an underdog for a while. No one believed that she would do it.
Now I feel like the underdog. I feel like I have let myself down. I have really learned a valuable lesson in procrastination. LOL. I have also learned a lesson in having plans. Even though my main plan sounds like an awesome plan, there are possibilities that the one you have your heart set is not the one for you. I have learned that now. But secretly, I don't even know if I ever wanted to go to grad school. This blow to my ego has really allowed me to reevaluate myself and what I want in a career. I have realize that I am so lazy as far as getting to the title. It seems like I just want the title: grad student, professional employee, career woman, etc. Do I even want to work for it anymore? With every approaching day, the answer is I do not feel like doing a thing. I want to lay in bed and pout about how I do not have a job and now how I am not in school and I have no plan Bs and that I will be in parents' house forever. UGH! That last one makes my stomach hurts just thinking about. However, regardless of how bad I do not want to work for it, if I want it...I will work for it.
So, I may have been knocked down this round, but I am still in this fight. Don't count me out yet. But do pray with me.