How Long I Have Been On My Journey

Sunday, June 17, 2012

High School: Who is doing something with their lives?

So, I graduated from a small little town in Alabama, #3 in my class. I thought it meant something, to be in the top 5% of a graduating class. However, when I went to college, NONE of this mattered. I started off at a community college. I did my two years and graduated Summa Cum Laude there. When I graduated community college in 2008, I was the first person in my class to graduate with a college degree. I felt like I was doing something. The val of my class graduated the same day from another community college. Then we both went to universities. She graduated 2010 with her degree. I graduated this year (2012). I am the second person in my class to have a bachelors. There may be two other people in my graduating class that is in college. When I went to my four year institute, there were alot of people that said that a majority of their class did not and will not go to college. But why is that? I understand that college is not for everyone, It almost wasnt for me. But I had to do what I had to do because my mindset was I wanted better for myself so I have to get this degree. I did have a lot of people tell me that I was only smart in my community and that I only got my two degrees from community college because it was probably easy. But they would say that I would not make it at "real" school. I have yet to realize what is a real school and a non-real school. However, I have three degrees in my room and these same people are in our hometown still doing nothing. I am a winner. So, everyone has had that story where you go off to school and come home and people are saying that you have changed and you think you are something because you are in college. That use to really hurt my feelings and made me want to cry sometimes. I have cried a few times. I have pride myself on the fact that I never change. For these people to tell me I have changed really made me feel fake. But it took alot of soul searching and life experiences to make me realize that these same people who said that I have changed really cannot keep up with me intellectually and are intimidated by me. I do not mean to sound like I am the absolute best thing since the wheel, but what I am saying is why they have to/had to knock me for me trying to do something with myself. Now, I just take it as a compliment. "Yes, I have changed. I want more for myself. I want to have a degree. I do not want to struggle in life. I am not in high school no more. High school will not be the highlight of my life. It is time for me to put my big girl panties on." I have and I have never looked back. So I have lost some friends. It gets really lonely. My phone do not ring like it used to. I do not get company over the house like I used to. I do not have people to text like I used to. But I am still getting my lessons and I am still trying to stack these degrees. I wish I could encourage many more of classmates to go to school and make something of themselvees, but they have to want it for themselves. I had to say to myself, "I do not want to be here struggling. I want to make money, enjoy my career and live good. I do not want to stay living in the past. I do not want to think what if I did things differently. It is time for me to put my big girl panties on." I have and I have never looked back :-)

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